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Selasa, 25 September 2012

How to Survive a Zombie Attack!

Pernahkah Anda menonton film zombie dan bertanya-tanya mengapa karakter tidak tahu bahwa mereka seharusnya menembak zombie di kepala? Apakah mereka tidak pernah melihat film zombie sendiri?

Pernahkah Anda bertanya-tanya apakah itu bahkan mungkin untuk menghidupkan kembali mayat mati?

Pernahkah Anda bertanya-tanya apa yang akan ANDA lakukan jika itu benar-benar terjadi?

Dalam kasus ini, saya akan memandu Anda melalui langkah demi langkah proses untuk bertahan hidup dari kiamat zombie.
 

Instructions

1. Tonton film zombie sebanyak mungkin yang Anda bisa sehingga pada saat serangan zombie yang sebenarnya terjadi, Anda akan terlalu peka untuk panik. 
Film yang disarankan : Shawn of the Dead, Dawn of the Dead, Night of the Living Dead, Resident Evil
Film untuk dihindari : The original Day of the Dead. Menonton film ini dapat menyebabkan perasaan ingin menembak diri sendiri di kepala, dengan atau tanpa infeksi dan kematian yang akan datang.

2. Kumpulkan benda tumpul : bisbol, kursi, meja, pemanggang roti, dan apa pun yang Anda mungkin temukan berguna.

3.  Anda harus memilih antara naik atas rumah atau melarikan diri ke mal.

4. Jangan mencoba untuk menghubungi keluarga kecuali Anda siap untuk menjadi zombie atau makanan zombie sendiri.

5. Jika Anda tidak memiliki akses ke senjata dan amunisi, Anda mungkin mempertimbangkan pergi ke toko Army / Navy lokal di kota. Jika Anda memiliki senjata dan amunisi, siapkan semua senjata dan bersiap-siap. 

6. Jika zombie berhasil membobol rumah Anda, tembaklah di kepala. Bukan hati, bukan batang tubuh, tapi di kepala.

Jika Anda kehabisan amunisi, gunakan cairan ringan dan cocok untuk menghancurkan zombie.
 

7. Jangan biarkan zombie menggigit atau mencakar Anda

8.  Jika zombie menggigit atau mencakar seseorang, orang itu akan berubah menjadi zombie dalam waktu kurang dari satu jam. Anda harus memilih apakah Anda ingin membunuh orang itu sekarang atau menunggu sampai ia menjadi zombie. 

Sabtu, 15 September 2012

Umm, Zombie?


You know what I find really interesting about zombies? Unlike almost all of their monster contemporaries, they are the only ones who are believed to be entirely fictional. And I'm talking about the undead, flesh-eating types, not the mind-controlled voodoo ones.
Nobody claims to have seen a zombie shuffling through the woods or has had investigators checking out zombie tracks from an alleged attack the night before. There simply aren't sightings like there are for werewolves, vampires, or the Jersey Devil. Zombies are entirely fictional creatures, at least for the moment. 

But these mindless flesh-eaters hold another unique position in the monster world. Functionally, they serve less as a 'scary monster' than they do as a herald for the end of the world. Whenever a story features zombies, it's almost always in an apocalyptic context. Like vampires and werewolves, humans can become zombies from a transfer of bodily fluids, but unlike vampires and werewolves, few people actually think it would be cool to be turned into a zombie. At least the other two monsters at least appear to be somewhat human, but zombies are essentially mindless freaks whose very existence signifies the potential end of humanity at large.

A 'zombie apocalypse' (a catastrophic event where humans are unwillingly turned into zombies on a massive scale) is largely considered a type of plague, which is why many modern storytellers choose the incursion of a biological virus to introduce this plague into the populous. This isn't necessarily true for the reanimated types though. Those brought back from the dead, with their rotting flesh and lumbering gait can be pulled from a cemetery for a night to terrorize the local community before heading back under ground.
In addition, the original "zombi" actually comes from Haitian Voodoo folklore, where the afflicted individuals were not dead at all, but rather possessed by sorcery. These key differences between varied mythologies make it difficult to find a single 'truth' to follow. 

What are Zombies?

Though it is difficult to come up with a single definition of what makes a proper zombie, there are enough commonalities between the core mythologies to fashion a fairly simple description.

First things first, zombies don't think for themselves. Whether they are consumed by rage, a mind-controlling disease or magic spell, or are simply too dead to reason anymore, a proper zombie cannot think for itself. This is what makes them so scary - there is no reasoning with them, no cure for their infection, they don't get tired, and they don't stop coming at you, no matter what. Some (particularly more modern) writers have tried to change things up by creating zombies that reason, strategize, and even lead others. In my opinion, this is where I have to draw the line. It is no longer a zombie if it can think for itself or reason between any options on a higher level than instinct alone. You now have a weird, crazy, possibly undead person - not a zombie.
Secondly, a zombie's only real instinct is to feed off of living flesh. At this point we have to separate out the Haitian zombi (which I will from hereon only refer to as a 'zombi'), as these are essentially people whose minds are being controlled by a living person (magical though they may be). A 'zombie', whether the living dead type or the disease-induced rage type, wants only to kill and to feed, and like a snobby food critic - only wants the freshest ingredients. I'm not so concerned if one particular mythology describes their walking dead as simply wanting to take a bite out of you, literally eating as much of you as possible, or is picky enough to only want to eat brains. It's all basically the same thing - feed on the living, the smarter the better.
At this point it seems fair to be able to split the remaining zombies into two categories - the fast ones and the slow ones. Again, different mythologies have different definitions, but in our quest to define a "singular truth", provided below is how I would define the two primary types.

Fast Zombies

You start with a human being. That human being is infected with a virus that causes them to lose all control. They become mindless, rage-filled death machines looking only to kill and feed. They are not unlike a transformed werewolf in this way. This 'fast zombie' is essentially like a diseased PCP addict on a rampage, except they seek out 'normal' people to devour for food. The hunger is what drives them. As with any virus, it looks to spread. Essentially the virus overtakes the human's mind and begins controlling it, driving the infected to spread this virus through saliva and blood transmission.

Unlike werewolves or vampires, the bite of a zombie is dangerous in that it contains a virus, rather than a bacteria. The virus takes over the victim's mind, and it's primary concern is to spread. This is why zombies do not attack one another. There is no need to infect someone who is already infected. The virus is smart. It knows this already.

So the zombie looks to bite, or to spit blood or saliva on a victim. Both the blood and saliva of a zombie are teeming with the virus. The animal part of the creature looks to feed, and so it often tries to eat its victim, which displeases the virus. But what can it do? A feeding zombie lives to infect again another day. The virus is patient that way. It understands.

Slow Zombies

Slow zombies are essentially the "living dead" or "walking dead". They are the re-animated bodies of dead people and their goal is primarily to feed on living flesh. The idea here is that their bodies are dead and rotting away and the only way to keep them 'alive' is by consuming living flesh. Think of it like how a living person can cut himself and have the wound heal over time. Our bodies are constantly regenerating new cells to replace dead or damaged cells, so it makes sense that zombies would seek this regenerative flesh in order to at least partially restore dead cells in their own bodies. The slow ones in particular seem to favor brains, possibly because the human brain has significantly stronger regenerative power for the undead than the rest of the body.
How they are re-animated happens in two primary ways. Like fast zombies, a human can become infected through the transmission of a virus via an exchange of bodily fluids. Unlike their faster counterparts, the victim usually dies before the body becomes reborn as a zombie. They are truly just dead people walking around and looking for living flesh to feed off of. One could create an army of the walking dead using only a virus, but this type of zombie also seems to reconnect with the original Haitian "zombi", where the creatures can be controlled through some form of black magic. The only real difference between this type of slow zombie and the Haitian "zombi" is that the slow zombie is indeed dead, while the Haitian zombi may still be a living person.

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Jumat, 14 September 2012

Lana Del Rey - Summertime Sadness


Kiss me hard before you go
Summertime sadness
I just wanted you to know
That baby you’re the best

I got my red dress on tonight
Dancing in the dark in the pale moonlight
Got my hair up real big beauty queen style
High heels off, I’m feeling alive

Oh, my God, I feel it in the air
Telephone wires above, all sizzling like a snare
Honey I’m on fire, I feel it everywhere
Nothing scares me anymore

Kiss me hard before you go
Summertime sadness
I just wanted you to know
That baby you’re the best

I’ve got that summertime, summertime sadness
S-s-summertime, summertime sadness
Got that summertime, summertime sadness
Oh, oh oh

I’m feelin’ electric tonight
Cruising down the coast goin’ ’bout 99
Got my bad baby by my heavenly side
I know if I go, I’ll die happy tonight

Oh, my God, I feel it in the air
Telephone wires above, all sizzling like a snare
Honey I’m on fire, I feel it everywhere
Nothing scares me anymore

Kiss me hard before you go
Summertime sadness
I just wanted you to know
That baby you’re the best

I’ve got that summertime, summertime sadness
S-s-summertime, summertime sadness
Got that summertime, summertime sadness
Oh, oh oh

I think I’ll miss you forever
Like the stars miss the sun in the morning skies
Late is better than never
Even if I’m gone I’m gonna drive, drive

I’ve got that summertime, summertime sadness
S-s-summertime, summertime sadness
Got that summertime, summertime sadness
Oh, oh oh

Kiss me hard before you go
Summer time sadness
I just wanted you to know
That baby you’re the best

I’ve got that summertime, summertime sadness
S-s-summertime, summertime sadness
Got that summertime, summertime sadness
Oh, oh oh

Kamis, 06 September 2012

Tears.

Yah, entahlah. Alasan lo itu bikin gue kayak ada paku di dada, trus di pukul pake palu. Lo kayaknya kalo suka sama orang liat dari tampang. Gue gasuka itu.
Ya sekarang udah kelas 3. Jadi gue mau fokus ke pelajaran dulu aja, gamau mikirin yang lain. Gue sekarang mau cuek aja. Terserah mau ada cewek ITU atau engga. Gue bakal jadi dingin, -1000 derajat. Mengingat sikap lo itu.

Ya Allah kenapa ya setiap gue suka sama orang selalu ada halangan -_-. Apa selama ini gue mencintai orang yang salah?  Semua orang punya kekurangan dan kelebihan kan? Kalo kekurangan gue itu pemalu. Tiap suka sama orang, pasti gue gaberani liat muka orang itu (kalo udah..... relationship) dan gue gaberani angkat telpon dari orang itu. Beberapa cowok yang pernah relationship bilang kalo gue ini terlalu pemalu. Dan, uhm, mungkin kronis. Sampe sampe ada yang kesel. Tapi bukankah manusia bersama untuk saling menerima kekurangan? Rasanya gue pengen teriak di depan mukanya sambil bilang," Heloooo, kalo lo gabisa nerima diri gue yang pemalu kayak gini, yaudah kita gausah bersama aja, karena gue nyari cowok yang bener2 nerima gue apa adanya" SLAP! Emang sih, pasti kalian berpikir gue ini payah lah danlainlain. Tapi kalian itu cuman gangerti. Seandainya aja lo kalian ada di posisi gue, dan mempunyai kekurangan ini. Lagipula bukan gue kok, yang mau punya sifat ini. Yah, syukurin aja. Masih mendinglah gue gaada kelainan

Masa sulit yaaa, hmmm -_- Rasanya setiap hal yang gue lakuin itu salah. Dan gue emang terlalu baik sama orang, bodohnya.
Masa SMP udah mau berakhir, walaupun ini September. Haha, gue udah merasakan ada aura sedih. Jadi tahun ini gue manfaatkan untuk merekam memori di SMP. Kapan lagi gue bisa jadi murid SMP? Ini tahun terakhir. Abis itu SMA, Kuliah, Kerja, danlainlain. Andaikan Neverland itu ada ;') Ya Allah... Gue itu mungkin selalu berimajinasi yang engga-engga. Harusnya gue sadar. Hadapi realita, saatnya mikirin yang pasti pasti aja, bukannya dunia dongeng dan semacamnya. Itulaaaah, mungkin imajinasi gue masih anak-anak -_- Tapi apa salahnya sih sedikit berimajinasi di saat banyak tugas melanda bagaikan tsunami dan lahar yang mengejar langkah kaki? Gue akui kelas 3 itu puncaknya semua masa sulit. Dan, yah, gue kangen kelas 2

Jadii, gue merasa udah kayak mayat hidup ._. Gaselalu tuh pelajar harus belajar melulu. Emang ada UU-nya? Ah, kesalnyaa -__-
Kapan nih ada hujan deras? Rasanya pingin berjalan dibawah hujan tanpa payung. Kenapa? Karena gabakal ada yang tau kalo orang itu nangis (?) Tapi serius deh, ujan itu bikin gue seneng sampe ke ubun-ubun ._. Entah alasannya karena bisa nangis tanpa ketahuanlah, bisa bernostalgia ujan-ujanan lah, tapi masih banyak lagi. Bau tanah yang abis hujan itu enak banget (if you know what i mean).

Daaan. Apakah tujuan hiduup itu? Entah kenapa gue lagi merenungi kehidupan (?) Apakah orang-orang yang kita temui hari ini, kemarin, dan yang lalu itu udah direncanakan sebelum kita lahir? dan pasti ada tujuannya. Ah, akhir-akhir ini juga seneng banget ngeliat bulan penuh berlama-lama. Rasanya tenang banget, sampe2 pingin ke bulan pake pintu kemana saja dan bisa bernapas seperti biasa di sana (?) Katanya disana gravitasinya 1/6 gravitasi bumi kan? Berarti kalo kita nangis, air mata kita bisa melayang dong? Keren.

RASANYA KALO KETEMU ORANG YANG NYEBELIN TUHH : Pingin nikam pisau tepat ke jantungnya, nembakin pistol tepat ke kepalanya, buka mulutnya dan paksa dia gigit granat atau engga rumahnya bakal diledakkin (?), jedotin kepalanya ke ujung meja, bacok pake sabit (?). Haha, sadis gue. Tapi tentu saja gue hanya melakukan itu di dalam imajinasi -_-

Mati lo, haters! -_-t cih

Sekarang pokoknya semua terserah aja, biarkan berjalan seadanya. Sampai kapan mau stuck terus? Gaada gunanya. Terserah dia mau ada cewek lain atau engga. Gue mah udah ikhlasin. Dia masih mau kayak gini terus juga terserah lah, gue udah gamau peduliin :' Udah gaada waktu buat galauin orang.

Peace and Sayonara